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Exploring My Phrase "I Guess.."

Posted by FloweringRose , 09 December 2010 · 20 views

So after reading through a lot of my poetry, in the hopes I can salvage some of the hundreds of pieces into a real memoir, I noticed a phrase I use continuously in my poetry.

"I guess..."

It may seem unprofessional to some, or unpoetic to others. But I really have trouble taking this phrase out of certain lines.
Since for me honestly this is *so powerful*. These two words describe two of the worst, most painful moments for me...they literally paint my inner landscape.

I use them when someone has said something positive that I know I can't believe or I'm not worth.
And I use them when someone has said something so heartbreaking, and I'm starting to accept it as truth...even though to do so may kill me inside.

Here's some snippets...

So now I simply know how to tread
Around the remains of it lurking in my head
I fear to touch the edges of us, of you
Who knows what cuts to my soul it will do
The fact remains it'll never be okay
We ended so violently the love could not stay
To think hate is only left, I'll never say sorry
This isn't the way you end your love stories
But I guess they lied that everything turns okay
I guess some things are meant to be frayed...


or


Don't worry about their cracks
You're the one who broke me
Rest assured, you won
I mean, can't you see that I'm smoking?
I guess you were right
And I was always wrong
Watching me crumble to dust
Just surprised it took me this long


Really painful moments/poetry for me. Especially the lines with the "I guess"

I've had to clean up quite a few "I guess" phrases from my work...but I thought it was kind of interesting how different parts of language that seem so insignificant can have such power on us. My hot spots are probably "never", "too late", "meant to be" or "meant it" etc. And there so small but the power behind them...it speaks volumes. And I guess that language is different for everyone; so that's how so many writers can exist an yet each one has something fresh and brilliant to bring. We all have our different subconscious codings and so we all have something different to say (and different ways to interpret!).

Anyhow just wanted to blog about language. Was surprised by my pattern and realizing what was behind that.



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