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It is so hard sometimes for me to keep in contact with people. My social anxieties, my phone anxieties and often my email anxieties only make it worse. and when the depression gets and I feel like curling up and disappearing...and others don't usually come with me.
but in reality; I LOVE PEOPLE. So much. I can't explain it but I love most everyone, I want everyone to be happy, to shine with them, to cry with them, to treat everyone else with that same love. I just want to be a giant circle of love with everyone. and yet sometimes I am so weakened by my emotions its hard to share that...its hard to show others that. and some don't try; and I can lose them because of the anxiety.
I really hope my friends and family and everyone will see through. will see to the heart inside and see I really don't mean to forget to call or retreat into myself every three weeks. I want to literally spill out my soul for them; I want to share in their joy, their pain, their triumph, their brilliance, for EVERYTHING they are. I don't want you to hide or me to hide; I want us to be free to share life together and enjoy.
so to everyone in the world I don't tell enough: I love you I love you I love you I love you!! I promise, and I will work to show that better and better with everyday. I really really do want you in my life and anytime you need me I am here with all my heart.
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