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JadeAngel's Blog



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madre mia

Posted by JadeAngel , 18 October 2010 · 44 views

so the idea of family is starting to take on a whole different meaning to me. i have a large family. i talk to my cousins, my aunts and 1 of my uncles. my great aunts and uncles, my 2nd cousins... i do genealogy with my grandfather and i even know some 4th/5th cousins 4/5 times removed. so yeah i have a very very large family.

however i am starting to s...


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my husband hates me

Posted by JadeAngel , 02 October 2010 · 30 views

god... cant you end this? i'm tired. i feel destroyed. problems in my marriage, i dont see them as so big. the problem i have most is that my husband is obsessed with these problems. he was talking about moving out. i cried myself to sleep last night. i woke up and i cried. i cant think clearly. i cant sort out this horrendous mess in my head. i'm...


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How much have I changed?

Posted by JadeAngel , 27 September 2010 · 31 views

Lately i've been thinking about what i use to want in love... and what i want now. i'm not sure i've changed all that much. i'm just bored and feel like writing something.

i'm old fashioned. i always have been and that hasn't changed that much. i didnt wanna have sex until i was married (well engaged it ended up being). i wanted a...


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On the brighter side

Posted by JadeAngel , 21 September 2010 · 26 views

I know my blogs are always kinda gloomy... I don't tend to write when I'm in a good mood. I write when I'm upset to get it out instead of keeping it in. Happy moments I will gladly keep :)

For a positive change in my typing... my baby has the most beautiful eyes. I look at her and can't believe how gorgeous she is, like did I really creat...


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Is it bound to end? :(

Posted by JadeAngel , 14 September 2010 · 24 views

He makes me feel like it's my fault. When I say anything, he says I just make him look horrible... that everything is his fault and he's the bad guy and he's evil. He says he knows I never do anything wrong (obviously in an annoyed 'yeah right' kinda way). Then I feel like he's trying to turn around anything I say on me. Trying to guilt me into not talkin...


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Weaning baby

Posted by JadeAngel , 11 September 2010 · 26 views

This is bad timing on all accounts. I have started weaning my baby. My husband questioned by I suddenly wanted to wean her when i was so set on breastfeeding until she was 18 months old. I had to explain to him that aside from her recently biting hard, she has become MORE attached to me than ever since i attempted to work. It pulled me away from her for o...


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contradictions

Posted by JadeAngel , 09 September 2010 · 29 views

Why is it that i'm the one with reason not to trust... yet i do trust.
that i'm the one with reason to be a pessimist... yet i am the optimist.
that i'm the one with reason to be suspicious... yet i am not the suspicious one.
why is it that i'm the one with all the "baggage" yet i seem deal with life better.
why is that?


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sort out this mess of a relationship

Posted by JadeAngel , 06 September 2010 · 29 views

i'll never get it. i dunno what to do sometimes, and i know in years i'll look back knowing exactly what i should have done but im not in the future so for now i just sit lost.

things with my husband have gotten so much better to an extent. its rare that we end up yelling at each other. maybe once a month... sometimes more sometimes less. now its...


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depressed

Posted by JadeAngel , 24 February 2010 · 25 views

im tired, im sad, im frustrated. yeah as though that's something new.

so an uncle died a couple of weeks ago, but i guess he was ready to go. death sucks but it happens i guess. and to be honest there's nothing 'new' to be bothering me. just old, just boring old problems. thinking a lot about my past. i guess i never regreted much because...


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as i grow

Posted by JadeAngel , 26 January 2010 · 26 views

i might say that i have finally started to see what i would have done differently.

the what ifs... or shall i say, what i would have handled differently had i been younger knowing what i know, having the experience i have and the time i have had to rethink all i have done.

i would have been stronger to stand up for myself more, but even now when i think...






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