Louises' Blog

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cut cut cut t its not gone away

07 March 2005

Posted by

i can see it in my mind, slashing my arms, and the relief and the screaming will stop and i will have some peace....i don't know how much longer i can fight this

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cut cut cut t

06 March 2005

Posted by

i need to cut i really really really need to cut but i have promised people i would try and not to but its all i can think about cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut i feel so bad tonight i have done for the past few days i am so out of it, i need to be human again please make it stop

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where do i go from here?

04 March 2005

Posted by

i was raped....ok so i have finally admitted that and come to terms with it. My question now is where do i go from here? it does feel somewhat freeing to have finally admitted it, but i am left with these images and feelings and i don't know what to do with them. it hurts, and cutting seems to be the only thing that helps, i am scaring myself...

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hurt hurt hurt

03 March 2005

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I can’t believe I told her all that. It was so hard and so scary. It was like reliving it I could feel their hands on me, in me it hurt so much hurt hurt hurt and I wanted to go home and it wouldn’t stop and they were laughing at me so much they thought my pain was funny it hurt and they made me do things they did things to me I had no idea I...

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hmmmmm

03 March 2005

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not sure what to say really. things are hard. i know now what happened, and that it was way worse than the few memories i had until now. i know that i am making progress with my t and that we are dealing with the issues but its hard and sometimes i feel like giving up. i am trying really hard not to cut, cos last time i did i scared myself by...

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