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Falula's Random Stuff


Insidious Depression

Posted by Falula , 05 November 2015 · 57 views

In hind sight I realize I've been depressed most of my life, including most of my childhood.  I've been treated for depression most of my adult life.  I've been on disability for "major depression" for the last few years.
The insidious nature of depression causes me to see most everything through "gray sky" glasses instead of the proverbi...


Making Amends To The Person Who Molested Me

Posted by Falula , 25 April 2013 · 456 views

Background …

I have a friend I'll call Bob, who is very confrontational and I found myself getting angry with him quite often in our conversations. I told him about my feelings of anger and he said it was because he didn't pat me on the back and say "poor Janice" like everyone else does. This made me still more angry.

We have both bee...


Survivors of Incest Anonymous

Posted by Falula , 22 April 2013 · 113 views

Survivors of Incest Anonymous


Decision-making is Still a Work in Progress for Teenagers

Posted by Falula , 26 March 2013 · 163 views

I found this interesting article written by Gargi Talukder | July 20, 2000 on Brain Connection which relates to the forum post Do you feel/believe you were complicit in your abuse? ...

Recent studies of brain development in teenagers may finally give parents the scientific authority to say "No you're not!" in answer to the common ado...


My Story

Posted by Falula , 12 March 2013 · 229 views

Last updated 7/2/2015

Up to 20 years old…
My parents divorced when I was four and a half due to an alcoholic father. He left around that time disappearing after 10 years , coming back in time for my 15th birthday. My mother resented me for being born and "ruining her life." Of course, I understand it wasn't my fault, but the lack of love on her p...


My Art 2013-03-11

Posted by Falula , 11 March 2013 · 138 views



Posted by Falula , 07 March 2013 · 49 views

Come and lay with me, my love
In your tender arms
Waiting for "sleep"
Drifting off to nothingness forever
What bliss! What nirvana!

It's in my veins
Oh, what peace!

No more pain
No more thoughts
No more hopes

What bliss! What nirvana!

It's in my veins
Oh, what peace!

No more reflection
No more anal...



Posted by Falula , 27 February 2013 · 42 views

Whew! I spent a day and night with my special someone. We rarely get opportunity to do that. It was awesome! I say again, it was awesome to spend time with him.

I did learn something though. I realized my recent week-long binge on Pandy's got my mind racing at a fevered pitch. He and I made an agreement that I initiated. He wouldn't talk...


First Letter from Chuck - 1987-03-17

Posted by Falula , 25 February 2013 · 57 views



3:08 pm

Transcription of the following scanned letter:

Letter from my mom's boyfriend of decades and the person who molested me…



More Than Words

Posted by Falula , in Uncategorized, love 23 February 2013 · 93 views

By Extreme

Saying I love you
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you
Not to say, but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do to make it real
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
'Cause I'd already know

What would you do if my heart was torn i...

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