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danusia007 and usspandora like this
Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, career and COLLEGE, career and UNIVERSITY, CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., CLINICAL SERVICES housing, CLINICAL SERVICES support, My Family I salute my brother, My Family SISTER, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, MY RAPIST, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, MY STORY, support
I am stunned still from all of the deaths in the last 5 years


I am at a loss for words by the insensitivity of some supports


and the kindness of others

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in career and COLLEGE, career and UNIVERSITY, career MY CAREER, REFLECTIONS, support
strange how at certain times of the year


I really miss the comroidorie (spell check please)



from work

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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My healing circle

06 August 2009
Posted by danusia007   in MY HEALING CIRCLE, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, REFLECTIONS, support
it ebbs and flows

people join

people go

it continues

to change


day by day

person by person

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, My Family I salute my brother, My Family MOM the delimna perp and survivor, My Family NEPHEW, My Family SISTER, MY HEALING CIRCLE, support
I wish that I could phone her and talk with her

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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And in the days to come

19 March 2009
Posted by danusia007   in MY HEALING CIRCLE, PROFILE, REFLECTIONS
May I be supported

by my healing circle

STRENGTHENED by their LOVE

From within and without,

ENCOURAGED BY THEIR KINDNESS


to be continued

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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a quote that helps

19 March 2009
Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, My Family I salute my brother, My Family SISTER, MY HEALING CIRCLE, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, support
I have this feeling


There's one more star

Up in the sky tonight



And even though

it's far away

Its brightness and warmth




Still reaches us here

To make the night

A little less dark


Maybe

It will come

Streaming in

On a ray of sunshine

Or it may arrive

In the warm smile

Of a friend




Or in

Some beautiful words


Your...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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I really am missing my aunt

02 February 2009
Posted by danusia007   in CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., cancer and ptsd, My Family MOM the delimna perp and survivor
the relative are getting together this month


I doubt that I will be attending !!!

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in CLINICAL SERVICES housing, MY RAPIST, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, support
dear danusia

just a short note to let you know that


what I said to you about the staff can kick you out


if you cant live independently, it doesnt apply to you.


dont be alarmed

im going through a hard time


i have never discussed anything you've told me with anyone I know


danusia


please accept my apologies


take care of...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, My Family I salute my brother
aunt age 4

godmother age 12

4 aunts 2 in 3 years

1 uncle

bf's father

4 friends in 3 years


and my brother has cancer !!!!

and i have my cancer scares

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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it is a sad commentary

20 December 2008
Posted by danusia007   in MY RAPIST, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, MY STORY, PROFILE, REFLECTIONS
when i can not safely attend a memorial service for a friend

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., CLINICAL SERVICES housing, CLINICAL SERVICES support, My Family I salute my brother, My Family OLDER BROTHER Perp and Victim, My Family SISTER, MY HEALING CIRCLE, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, support
especially about how others judge the grief stricken.

As well, that a lot of my behaviours are normal for grief

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in REFLECTIONS, MY STORY, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, cancer and ptsd, support
The first group was ok. I did not binge during the group YAY ! I was able to tell a little about some of the deaths that have happened.

I am looking forward to the next group.

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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what is courage ?

16 September 2008
Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, MY HEALING CIRCLE
My first christmas

she is 11 soon to be 12

My second birthday

she is 13

I am siting on her lap

playing with farm animals

I am 3

She is 15

we are at the funeral for her mother


I am 4

She is 16


she is the bridesmaid for her older sister


I am the flower girl

who will be indulged with ice creamsundaes


I am 6

She is 18


her bridal...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in REFLECTIONS, MY STORY, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, MY RAPIST, MY HEALING CIRCLE sometimes a friend, MY HEALING CIRCLE, My Family SISTER, cancer and ptsd, support, ACTIVIST
at some point I may list all of her community work

today I was crying


about remembering a speech she gave for her friend


after her friend's death,


she gave her friend a voice.


about remembering how she gave me the opportunity

to speak about my sister

she gave my sister a voice.

about remembering how for years

she helped give a...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Death of oldest cousin

07 April 2008
Posted by danusia007   in CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., My Family MOM the delimna perp and survivor
Mom told me after the funeral

(Dear Relatives I can not be at an event that I do not know about)

The shock of the first month is wearing off.


I am trying to sort through memories of her,


She was a lot older than me,

her children are closer in age to me.

I hope to write more when life is less hectic.

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in CLINICAL SERVICES support, My Family SISTER, MY RAPIST, MY STALKER AND ASSAILANT, MY STORY, REFLECTIONS, support
I was told after the service.

I was stunned to learn that she was my sister's age.

I had to be careful who I spoke with.

I had about a week of feeling that I could not speak about her abuse.

I then decided that the judge would be the only one to make that decision.


I plan on writing more later when life is less hectic

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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Posted by danusia007   in CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., CLINICAL SERVICES housing, CLINICAL SERVICES support, MY STORY, REFLECTIONS, support
My MD wants me to get his obit (death notice)

- she has gotten to follow some of the family dynamics


TRIGGER WARNINGS


Dad's (p) older brother (p)

dad died before his older brother(p)

This uncle was there for my homecoming following my birth

he was at my parent's house for his own daughter's birth (age 3 months)

my parents...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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death of an aunt

11 September 2007
Posted by danusia007   in support, REFLECTIONS, MY STORY, My Family MOM the delimna perp and survivor, My Family I salute my brother, CLINICAL SERVICES health serv..., cancer and ptsd
before tribunal



she was my mother's friend for most of her life


she was severely abused by her dad (my dad was her brother)


she told me that my dad would protect her from their dad


she had a lot of denial of her own abuse experience (edit with different word )


she is survived by most of her children and grandchildren



she was one...
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Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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death of a friend

10 September 2007
Posted by danusia007   in career and UNIVERSITY, My Family OLDER BROTHER Perp and Victim, MY RAPIST, MY STORY, REFLECTIONS, support
from uni

told by my rapist

she had been dead

several months

her death was posted

in a newsletter

I wanted to contact her sister

she had been a support

around my brother's suicide

I ended up telling friends from uni

about her death

4 years later when my sister died

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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death of an uncle

08 September 2007
Posted by danusia007   in cancer and ptsd, MY HEALING CIRCLE, MY STORY, PROFILE, support
4 years of cancer

told in my only letter from mom(p)

told 2 years later

after his death

no one in the family

contacted me


memories of him

from age 6 on


he came to my parent's house

every Christmas Eve

Tags: Please share my grief a healing circle

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About my blog

This is basically my space to spill out everything I'm thinking and feeling.

Please note that some of the content here may be triggering.

What I write here is just me being honest with myself. Mostly just venting about things, realisations, and my path through healing.

There will be talk of CSA, SA, R, SI and ED here.

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