blondie2002 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Wow. I read about that & I was angered by it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahvnon Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 This didn't happen to me, but its definitely one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. When mom was a teenager, one night her older brother came home very drunk and got into her bed and started "trying things" is how she put it. She kind of says "what the hell? " and he gets confused and apologizes and stumbles of to his own bed. The next day, she telling their slightly younger sister about it, very upset and needing comfort. Sister says "stop lying. We both know I'm the pretty one, if he was going to 'try something' it would be with me. " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilyana Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 When, on my escape trip from my "boyfriend's" house in Indiana (if anyone who is that horrible deserves that title...), I told my mom why I was leaving him, she replied, "You don't have to make up excuses for why you're breaking up with him. If things didn't work out just say so." Thanks, Mom, for calling me a liar when I'm trying to confide something very terrifying & traumatic to you... It took 6 years before I could speak with her normally & begin to trust her again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AMAY Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 When meeting with a new psychiatrist and I told him I had been r**ed... So that was your first sexual experience? NO! That was an act of violence not sex! A**. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peanuthead Posted September 1, 2014 Share Posted September 1, 2014 I had a friend address me in front of everyone at a bonfire and say "jane said joe raped you is that true?" (Code names of course) but really youd ask someone that infront of a party full of people. I lied anf quickly said no I didnt want everyone to know and I knew what he would do to me if I told. I didnt even press charges for that reason. I was humiliated once again and couldnt leave that place fast enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eeyorestale Posted September 1, 2014 Share Posted September 1, 2014 As an explanation for why I am having a difficult time dealing with the aftermath of the abuse my wife suggested that perhaps I had eaten to many sugary snacks, thanks but I was a child when it happened; I think I can control the snacks now, UGH Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
free2speak Posted September 4, 2014 Share Posted September 4, 2014 (edited) I told my counselor on day one that I used my weight to avoid sexual relationships (on account of my CSA). My t gave me a crazed, incredulous look. "That's not what r*pe is about!!!" Sure, invalidate the client. Use textbooks to invalidate the client. Talk shit about the client's feelings and invalidate instincts that are common to so many CSA survivors. God, that whole conversation wore on me, made my day feel heavy, dark. . Edited September 6, 2014 by free2speak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
howard Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Ugh, free2speak. What a horrible gut punch! Does he/she know anything about CSA? What an imbecilic comment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
germainemarie Posted September 20, 2014 Share Posted September 20, 2014 Dumbest thing anyone had said to me yet when I was telling them about my recent incident of abuse. .. "At least you know somebody wanted you" Yeah. .. wanted to completely demolish me, mind, body & soul. Don't know what people are thinking or where they get these ideas. .. it has nothing to do withany kind of feelings or desire for me & everything to do with his desire to obliterate my will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8888 Posted September 27, 2014 Share Posted September 27, 2014 "He couldn't have taken it that far, somebody would have noticed" How do you know? You weren't there. I wish somebody would have noticed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hrabradjevojka Posted September 28, 2014 Share Posted September 28, 2014 Counselors comment 'he must be dangerous' I was thinking jeez i think i already know that much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RosesAndNettles Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 My boyfriend earlier told me he'd talked to his friend about my SA (without telling me he had) and he said "The same thing happened to her girlfriend, only she was actually raped" Oh thanks, so you're basically either calling me a liar without realising or implying that what happened to me wasn't bad. Thanks a lot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tear_stained336 Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 My mother once told me in response to the topic of my CSA by my father, "I just don't understand why he chose you over me." Soooo... You're jealous? Thanks ma! Nothing has ever made me feel so dirty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodean Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Oh Tear_stained336, I'm so very sorry she said that. I think that definitely rates as a top ten stupid things to say. Safe hugs if that's okay with you. Rodean Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tear_stained336 Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 Thank you for the hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryony Posted October 2, 2014 Share Posted October 2, 2014 On telling the only person who knows. The very first thing he said: ''so you mean you're not a virgin?'' So I've just told you about SA, you know it's something I've never said out loud to anyone before, and the bit that you want to focus on is whether or not I'd technically be considered a virgin. It doesn't even feel right to use the word 'virgin' when you're talking about a six year old. I can't even explain why it bothered me, but it made me feel sick. I think it was the emphasis on me, as though it was something I'd ''done'', that made it feel so bad. Like I was impure or something. That probably sounds like an overreaction... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frannie Posted October 15, 2014 Share Posted October 15, 2014 I just told my partner about the man who attacked me on the street long time ago and his first question was "What were you wearing?" When I was a child we watched the news on TV about raped women and my mom commented "Why are these women so upset? They should be happy!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinaL Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Ummm......Frannie I have no idea why your mom would say something so ridiculous like that!! OMG.....that is a terrible message to relay to a child! Cannot understand some people's reactions. Sorry you had to hear that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tear_stained336 Posted November 3, 2014 Share Posted November 3, 2014 After having sex for the very first time, my ex told me, Him: "Now I know you weren't lying about the SA." Me: "what do you mean? " Him: "You didn't even bleed." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lannie Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 Tear-stained, My ex told me the very same thing...."you didn't bleed..." He told me this upon returning from our honeymoon. The "marriage" went downhill from there...can't say more tonight... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
falealili Posted November 4, 2014 Share Posted November 4, 2014 How about,"You can easily feel better if you just smile. Fake it til you make it and you'll find you can change your attitude and become happy"(heard in a Sunday school class). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Glamazon Posted November 5, 2014 Share Posted November 5, 2014 I have heard that comment a thousand times over, "Fake it til you make it". It was my motto during college. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tear_stained336 Posted November 5, 2014 Share Posted November 5, 2014 Lannie, I'm sorry you had to experience that idiotic comment as well. I hate pretty much any comment that makes it seem like you should just pretend like you're fine. "Fake it til you make it" is one of my least favorites. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jhonenslilartist Posted November 8, 2014 Share Posted November 8, 2014 I was sexually assaulted by my physical therapist. I went to the police right away who contacted the local district attorney to review my case. Since it was an attorney that specializes in cases of a sensitive and sexual nature, I figured he'd have some tact in dealing with victims. I guess I was wrong because he proceeded to ask what I was wearing when it happened, as if that really had any bearing on why it happened to me. Thanks justice system, you continue to prove I can't trust you at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinaL Posted November 8, 2014 Share Posted November 8, 2014 Jhonenslilartist, ?? I am astounded that an attorney, in this day and age, would ask you what you were wearing???? Sorry, was going to post a very derogatory and sarcastic comment but have stopped myself. Sorry, you had to endure that!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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