Tsuena

New forum suggestion

4 posts in this topic

Hi everyone,

This might be over-sensitive, over-attentive and impractical, but I struggle with these things so please let me know gently if I'm going off on one!

I haven't been on Pandy's all that long but I love it as both a place I can talk to people who understand what I'm going through, and somewhere to get support when I'm in a bad place. Just being here for a couple of months has changed my outlook on what happened to me so much, and I feel like I've been able to help people along the way, and that makes me so happy and content. I have noticed one thing that I think could be made better... I'm just not sure if it's what Pandy's is about.

I see a lot of people posting in My Voice looking for people to sit with them, give them hugs and just be there for them, in the moment when they're feeling horrible. By the nature of the site, sometimes there are no people there for them, and they can be left waiting for support that comes hours later. I personally struggle with being over-sensitive and people-paranoid, and watching the 'view' count go up without anyone posting even to say they read makes me hurt and angry. For someone in as dark a place as some of you are when you post, I can imagine that would hurt all the more.

I was wondering if there's any possibility that something like a 'Quick Help' forum could be set up, for people who aren't looking for long, thoughtful replies or advice, but for someone to be there for them, there and then, with compassion and empathy. Obviously it couldn't be instant, nor could anyone expect that, but a different forum so that a plea for help doesn't get lost in My Voice might be a helpful thing. I realise this might not help because people might expect a response faster, therefore be more hurt. However, I feel people would be more likely to post in a forum where they know that replies are more useful than just reading. Survivors needing hugs and empathy at that time could find each other more easily as well.

If this is just me, please let me know. If I haven't really thought this through, please let me know that as well. I'm very scared posting this, but I'd hate for someone to fight for the courage to reach out, and find nobody reaching back.

Thanks for reading... I hope I'm not being a moron. :scared:/>

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Hi Tsuena,

This is something to consider hon. I'm not sure if it would help or hurt more as you've said people might expect a faster response. I think if someone is in that much of a desperate despair they might be in need of more than an online message board can offer. An emergency room or rape crisis center might be a better place. We shall see. :)

Please don't ever worry about suggesting something! We appreciate new ideas and consider all of them as a team.

Thank you,

Susan

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Thank you for the suggestion. I will pass it on to the other section moderators and to the Board moderators. I am not sure exactly how to manage it, as I think about how I do my best to respond within My Voice. I understand the need to KNOW you are heard and that others are empathizing with you.

Patricia

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Oh I just realised how that sounded... Patricia please don't think I'm criticising you in the slightest, you do an incredible job and I see you comforting people with such compassion and wisdom all the time, I'm so happy and cheered to see someone with so much time and thought for other people, and you're always there for everyone. I'm sorry if it sounded that way at all. I admire you and the other regular posters in My Voice so, so much, you're my heroes.

Thanks for considering it, that's more than I thought it deserved, to be honest! You all already do so much for us, I'm so happy to have found Pandy's.

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