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About TekamahAkina

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  1. Let's see, another one that recently popped up is that memorylane.com commercial that comes on in the states. I stupidly went looking for an ex crush's father in a yearbook on that site and found him, but also found the father of my friend, the one and only. It was something like a guttaral reaction of sickness, sadness, shame, terror, etc. Now i hear that song I think of those pics of him in high school and I hate it. I hate that i found him there i hate that he's literally haunting me from the grave. So now thats a huge and new major trigger, and I know why but i don't know how to move past this trigger. Even piano music on other commercials are making me freeze, and I don't know why i'm letting this issuse have such a tremendous hold on me.
  2. Powerful...
  3. Men with long hair....he had long hair. And I remember feeling it all over my face while he was getting what he wanted. It smelled bad, I don't think he washed it as much as he should've, and it was greasy. I hate long hair, especially men of ethnicity (hispanic, american indian, etc) Dark complected men with long hair is a huge trigger.
  4. He did....I went to talk to his wife or his daughter (both she was a family friend, and his daughter was and still is a good friend) about a male friend who had been doing things I wasn't comfortable with....he took that to a whole new level, and yes, I still feel betrayed by that sense. My father for saying I may have "made it up" so my SO wouldn't think I was "easy" or getting around prior to getting in a relationship with him. I'm just like come on, i worked, had school, did a few extracurricular activities in school, when would I get the time or the energy to have a sex life? IDK why he said it but I still feel angry and hurt he would say that. He was barely there in that time period, we just coexisted under a roof and four walls, so yeah, he certainly has no right to make that sweeping judgement. I to this day still feel a lot of resentment and hostility over that. Right now thats all I can think of.